COUNTDOWN!

Finally, it's all coming together. Here is the countdown:

4 - Weeks until Ken comes home.

3 - Days left in the semester.

2 - Sets of portfolios left to grade.

1 - Trip to Nebraska to make to help a friend move.

0 - Energy left.

I Just Needed a Break!

Today was a day very much unlike me. I arrived to my office at 6:15, as usual to hurriedly finish the last few papers I needed to grade before my 8:00 a.m. class. By 6:45, I knew I'd had it. I couldn't touch another student paper. My head started hurting, my stomach got queasy, and all I could think of was going home and going back to bed. You must understand, that this was not an easy decision for me. You're looking at the blog of a girl who missed 1 day of high school in 4 years and that was because my car wouldn't start one winter morning....yes, I am that big of a dork. It's hard for me to not be at work unless something is physically wrong with me or I am on death's door. The only day I missed at my previous job was because I threw my back out. I was back by the next day though I was in a lot of pain, and though I hated the job anyway, I was there.

Back to this morning. I just couldn't do it. After a week of dealing with student who hates me (who, by the way, decided that she would complain to my dept chair about me yesterday and who decided she will come back to my class after all even though I'm a terrible person and she can't learn anything from me), grading papers non-stop because portfolios are due just around the corner, and all the other daily stuff I've been feeling and dealing with, I just couldn't take it anymore. And so, yes, I went home! I left messages for the dept. secretary and my dept. chair telling them I was here but was going home ill. I asked them to put notes on my door for students, and that was it. I was out of there!

By the time I got home, it was roughly 7:10 a.m. I put on my pajamas and crawled back to bed. The next thing I know it's 12:30 pm and I have two cats in bed with me. Very cozy! I pulled myself out of bed, had a little soup, and tried to grade some papers. After two hours of being awake, my head started pounding and I went back to bed. So, from 2:30-5:30 I slept again. I think it was the whole psychological thing of grading papers and thinking about students.

Now, it's 10:00 p.m. I suppose I should go to bed so that I can go to work tomorrow and finish out the week. I still have 15 papers yet to grade sometime tomorrow as there may be students coming to get them. Yet, after today's events, I'm left wondering, "what's wrong with me?" Am I fighting something? Am I just exhausted? I love my job, so why am I so fatigued just thinking about going back there right now? I suppose I'm just exhausted, but that's not good considering that there is still about a week left in the semester. I don't know how I'm going to do it. All I want to do is go to bed and pretend that this semester is over. Perhaps I shall go to bed now and dream of the day my finals are turned in and summer officially begins.

Weekly Update

I just wrote Ken an email updating him on the state of things at home. Thinking that it also sounded like a good blog post, I decided to include most of it here for my 1-2 readers. :-) Note: Content has been edited for nature of blog and interest of readers...

Well, it was another interesting week as the live-alone wife of a soldier deployed to a foreign country in a time of war. Playing homemaker, working woman, and caregiver to three cats is certainly time consuming. Things at home are fine though sometimes things get hectic with trying to keep the house decently picked up, mowing the lawn, getting the garbage out, and remembering to pay bills and get the rent paid. Often I have the house picked up on the weekend, and by Wednesday it looks like crap:dishes in the sink, empty water bottles on the counter, hair care products in the bathroom and cat hair rolling around the house like little tumbleweeds. By Friday night, I can hardly stand it and so I take what was once "Date Night" and use it to scrub the place down. Very romantic and exciting, eh? That's what I did this Friday night. I was so disgusted by the state of the house that after vacuuming the whole place, I brought up the carpet cleaner and did the bedrooms and hallway (wood floor in rest of house). Much needed! I also gave the bathroom a good scrub down by doing the toilet, tub, floor, and sink. I even put a new plastic shower curtain in. Wow! My first shower in that baby was like staying in a luxury hotel! By the end of the night while the dishwasher was swirling away, I had time to do a little sewing in my clean little house and went to bed in crisp clean sheets. Heaven!

Work is work. I went in a t 6:00 a.m. every day to get some work done. I can get more done in the morning anyway. Even now, it's 8:28 p.m., and I'm ready for bed! I was very productive though in the mornings and felt pretty good by the end of the week in terms of all that I accomplished. Sadly, I'm behind now again as I received a batch of papers on Friday that I didn't touch all weekend. I am going to be revising our course curricula this coming year though, changing our current system of only 2 developmental writing classes to 3! Yeah, in one of my freer moments, I came up with this brilliant plan which will ultimately make more work for myself. Real smart, huh?

The infamous writing student who has hated me all semester now hates me even more than ever. How can that be, you ask? Well, she received another failing grade on her 4th paper and once again blamed her bad grade on the fact that she believes I don't like her. Well of course I don't like her! How can I like her after all the crap she's pulled this semester? Still, she is graded in the same manner as all the other students, using the same grade sheet, scoring with revision comments, and the most objective system possible I use for all students. This time I even had another writing teacher read her paper too to get those comments and to make sure that I wasn't subconsciously grading her down. That teacher said she would have graded her worse than I did! I felt vindicated! Anyway, this student informed me on Friday that she won't be coming to my class anymore for the rest of the semester (2 weeks left) because she doesn't like me and because I'm not fair. Fine by me. One less thing to worry about.

I've also been taking on several textbook reviews lately too. Two for Pearson books and one for Cengage. I just received an email asking me to do another one for Cengage, so I'm excited! The money is most decent and definitely worth the time. I'm thinking....Vacation Money!!! Hawaii, Niagra Falls, Yellowstone, Rhode Island, here we come! (Rhode Island = Warwick, RI home of the TAPS team from Ghosthunters.)

Anyway, the cats are good. Little Miss Girl Cat (still working on a new name) is bossing the boys around and chasing Artemus all over the house. It's quite funny to watch. Not much else new on that front except that I'm sick to death of people calling me a crazy cat lady! I finally started telling people that if I had 3 children, no one would say such a thing and call me the "crazy child woman," so why do that when I have cats?! I hate the double standard for pet people vs child-bearing folk. Now, I'm leaning more and more to the child-free lifestyle just to make a point.

Okay, I think I better go to bed now. I'm going in at 6 a.m. to get work done, then teach 9-11 and 1-2, and then have my teaching class from 3-5 (ugh) tomorrow afternoon. In that, I have to give a presentation on what I do in the classroom to attend to multiple literacies and learning styles (BORING!). I had to write that paper tonight. Normally, the old me would have had that done weeks ago, but the new overly busy me has learned to not freak out and be so OCD about such things. Doing projects, writing reviews, and grading papers is happening at the last minute. Who knew I could do such a thing!

The semester is almost over. The official countdown to my Kenny coming home may now begin!

It's a Girl!

Meet Miss Holly, our new little girl kitty. Miss Holly joined our home a week ago. Her former owner had to go live in a nursing home and was unable to care for her anymore, and so Miss Holly needed a new home and came to live with us. Her owner was the mother of a family member in Ken's army group, and since we've gotten to know each other through this deployment, I knew about the owner's situation and offered to take Miss Holly in. She came with the name Holly, and since I have a friend named Holly, I'm still working on what to call the cat. Miss Holly seems to be the best fit so far since she does know and respond to her name ( I don't think I could change it on her.)

It was an interested first week as Miss Holly, Tucker, and Artemus adjusted to one another. The first week was filled with hissing, growling and swatting, mostly by Tucker and Artemus. Miss Holly just stayed away from the boys, for the most part, but she really had no fear from them and was perfectly happy wandering around all parts of the house and staking out her new territory. She's extremely cuddly and is on my lap almost before I can sit down. She follows me around and is seeming to get closer to the other two. I think it's a matter of time before I find them cuddled up together on the couch.

Happy Anniversary to Me

One year married. I spent my first wedding anniversary in Illinois with my sis-in-law Lisa. We had a girls' weekend shopping and dining in the suburbs of Illinois. It was a lovely trip and we had so many laughs. Seriously, both of our faces hurt by the last day from laughing and smiling so much. It was a wonderful trip and a much-needed pick-me-up. Maybe this will become my anniversary tradition? I suppose I could include Ken in the plans; after all, we did miss him and Matt carrying our shopping bags back to the car during our shopping extravaganza.

I would like to thank everyone for their lovely anniversary cards and gifts: Terry and Melissa, Lynsey and Jeremy, Cletus and Evelyn, Katie and Ben, Klein family, and Jim and Sharon. You all made me so happy! I never remember anyone's anniversary, so the thought that you all remembered me made my day extra special.

Spring break is almost over, and after a week of beautiful 60-degree weather, it's snowing outside. SNOWING! Okay, so you know I like snow, but this is ridiculous. I was outside in my bare feet yesterday and now I'm wrapped in a blanket shivering in the house. (I refuse to turn the heat up!)

Over break, I managed to complete my very first quilt! Will post pictures soon. I'm super excited to say that I'm an official quilter now. I can't wait to begin my next one, but that will probably have to wait until the semester's over.

Here's one picture that is from home. Here is my cat Artemus in my bed. This is what happens when I try to make the bed and one cat in particular is not ready to get up. Solution: Make the bed around him and leave it at that.

And here is a closeup:

4 Months in a Nutshell

Well, here I am. After far too long of not posting, I've made it back. I've been fine, really, so I apologize to any readers (if there are actually any of you out there) for not posting since October. Midterm is always terrible for me, and apparently it was so bad last year that I didn't find time to post again until this semester's midterm!

Here is my quickie catch-up for the past 4 months. Warning! November and December are rather depressing. Read with wine and anti-depressants nearby.

November:

I kept busy with school, grading, students, etc. I dreaded the thought of Thanksgiving without Ken here and me having to do family rounds without him. As a result, I went into major hiding from the week before Thanksgiving until January 1. I basically just didn't want to deal with the holidays and since the major ones start in November, I was almost inaccessible for two months. Another reason for not posting much since then. Work and helping my friend Lynn with house remodeling projects was about all I could manage.

December:

December was worse than November with all the wonderful snow and holiday spirit being thrown around by all. I just couldn't get into it all and didn't even want to try. Once the semester was over and final grades were turned in, I resumed being in hiding for the majority of break. This was a really tough time for me. Trying to deal with Christmas without Ken was a nightmare, and though friends and family tried to reach out for support, it was difficult for me to accept help. I decided that if I ever have to spend any future winter holidays without Ken, I am going far far far away from home. It's too hard to deal with the memories and loneliness at home. I don't know how others manage to do it after a spouse is gone. The best thing about Christmas was when Ken Skyped me from overseas on Xmas. I was able to see him for the first time in about 6 months, and I got to watch him open the box of presents I sent him. That was the best gift I could have ever received. Seriously, I'm getting teary now just remembering it. It was one of the brightest spots in several weeks of feeling terribly sad.

January:

Once the last family Christmas gathering was done, I felt an enormous weight lifted off my shoulders. I awoke that day with renewed energy and a sense of being ok. I've never felt such a sense of exhaustion being swept away. Amazing what a calendar change can do to a person. Though school was about to start again, I had Ken's two-week leave visit to look forward to. He was home and we had a wonderful time together. It was just like before he left, wonderful. We spent time at home, with family, and then traveled to Wisconsin to see friends. We also took a trip to Branson to get away. The time went by far too quickly, and before we knew it, he had to return.

February:

Thank goodness for short months. I've been keeping busy with work, sewing, and knitting. The last two are my two hobbies that I picked up at the start of this year. So far, I'm loving them, and am working on quilting, which is something I've wanted to learn how to do for a very long time. It's a slow-going process when there is so much other work to do on the weekends, but I've been trying to make time for myself.

March...?

March begins tomorrow. Only 2 weeks left until Spring Break. Boy, am I ready for it. I'm feeling better, but have reached the point where I just want this deployment to be over. I need life to get back to "normal" or at least for us to figure out what "normal" actually means. For starters, I'll try to be better about posting. :-)

Birthday Celebrations

I guess it's been a while since I've posted on here. Things are in full swing around here with work and other obligations. I feel like I hardly had time to have a birthday, but I did. Oct. 20 was my 32 birthday. Hard to believe in one way, but the number didn't really phase me. 31 was the hard one for me, as I think 35 or 36 will be later. The people in my office at work think I'm just a baby, so that makes me feel younger too. I spent the day teaching, but only had two classes, so that was nice. I also received flowers, one plant from friends Jeff and Kelly, and my usual monthly rose bouquet from Ken. Lovely!

That evening, I went to dinner at one of the very nice Italian restaurants in town called My Verona. I haven't been there so it was a real treat to try it. Melissa, Audra, Nadia and I had a wonderful time, and Nadia treated me to a luscious and very decadent dessert! She insisted on getting a picture of me blowing out the candle.

I also received some birthday Beef & Noodle soup from grandma, which is the best! She made me three containers full: one to eat that week and two to freeze. In all, a wonderful birthday. I was sad Ken couldn't be here, but he will be here in the years to come. Now it's back to grading those piles of papers stacked on my kitchen table.