My Days are Numbered...

...in Illinois that is. It's my second to last day of tutoring at HCC. I'll miss the people here. It's fun just sort of hanging out, not doing much, and getting paid. I wonder if I'll ever have days like this again. After all, here I am "tutoring" and I'm updating my blog. Maybe it's just a grad student thing. Someone in the "real world" may actually expect me to work someday.

Not much new really to report. The diss is all turned in, and I have yet to get a phone call from the Grad School telling me that I made some horrible blunder on my printed copies, so I might just be home free on the thing. I'm working extra hours at the CTLT-LMNOP this week to make up for the 3 days I'm missing next week due to my jaunt to Iowa. This will be weird. Drive to Iowa Friday afternoon/evening, drive back to Illinois Wednesday morning, family arrive Friday for graduation, drive home (for good) on Saturday.

The two main questions most prevelant on people's minds: 1) have you found a place to live yet. ANSWER: NO. 2) Have you found a job yet. ANSWER: NO. I've applied for some good jobs at cool schools and am keeping my fingers crossed that I'll get a call for an interview. Still thinking about the online teaching thing, but am now waiting for word from the chair of that school to "approve" me. I also might try this editing internship gig with Rachel's publishing company. I'm a little worried about the time commitment involved though and it doesn't pay anything for quite some time. I guess I'm still tryingto think about whether I can do it or not. Part of me is also afraid to fail. I've never been a content editor and am afraid to be told after a few months of training that I don't have the right stuff for it. I suppose I should just go for it and see what happens. It could be a really cool opportunity.

Relishing in the sheer pleasure of it all

I can't even begin to tell you how good it feels to be done! At this point all I have to do is finish printing the "good" copies of the diss for my meeting with the Grad School lady on Monday. She may tell me that I have some minor formatting adjustments to make, but I can handle that. Yesterday, I spent an eternity making 6 copies of the whole thing and took those to Milner Library to have them bound. I even ran my signed oral exam sheet over to Diane in the English office. I just have to get the good copy formatting done and I am home free!

Oh, and here's a picture of a bridge in Manassas where part of the battle of Bull Run took place. Ken, Mom, and I drove around the Bull Run 1 and 2 battlefields when we were in DC. I didn't even know there were 2 battles of Bull Run -- isn't that terrible? Anyway, I thought the bridge was a rather fitting metaphor for this time of transition in my life, so I included it here.

So, Ken came up this weekend, which is really nice. We're going to do some running around today and just have fun. It's such a weird feeling to not feel the urgency of needing to "get back to the diss work." I think I could get used to this! Of course, I'm still in the process of looking for a job, but that's going ok. I sent another application off this week and even got a call last week for an interview at a community college in Iowa. Fingers crossed. Claire keeps telling me that I'll probably get an influx of interviews all at once and then I'll be sorry I complained about not getting anything. :) Here's hoping!

I've been trying to get my summer plans in order. In addition to moving home, finding a home with Ken, and looking for a full-time job, I may be doing some summer (and possible fall/spring) teaching part-time for the University of Phoenix online. I applied to teach with them and I'm now in phase 3 or 4 of the interview process. Who knew it would be so rigorous! First, I had to send in application materials, then I had to answer online interview questions via email, then have a phone interview. Oh, so I guess I'm in phase 4 because now I have to do some practice online exercises to see how nicely I respond to students. Then there's a co-teaching/mentoring phase, during which time I work more intensely with the online system. After that, I get to co-teach a course with a mentor and get paid for doing that, and then they decide if they really want to keep me on as a faculty member or not. I'm actually kind of impressed by how detailed the whole process is. It appears that they really do care about bringing on good teachers.

Other than that, I'll be doing my yearly trip to Daytona Beach, FL for the AP reading in June. Another job that will help tide me over until full-time work comes my way. I'll be rooming with Jan N again this year, which will be fun. We had a good time together last year, so I'm looking forward to that again. Plus this is the last year in Florida (Kansas City next year), so I'm going to enjoy the beach!

Here's another DC picture. This is a shot of the ceiling in the Capitol building in Washington, DC. As you can see, I'm into taking black and white pictures. Though the ceiling is really pretty in color too, I like the contrast this shot provides.

Ok, we're off to do some running around this morning. Must get thank yous for the committee members and others.

Dr. Me

It's official! I'm done. The defense went a lot more smoothly than I thought it would. What surprised me the most was that it only lasted 50 minutes. I thought it would go about an hour, but then I heard people talking about some that go over an hour, like an hour and a half or even two hours. I really didn't think it would last that long, but one's mind really starts to do crazy things when one is getting nervous. Anyway, it went fine, and like Jan said, I don't remember much of it at all. I remember being nervous before it started. I came to the room early just so I could acclimate myself to the space. I remember getting less nervous as my friends arrived and I just started talking to them. Then I remember doing my little summary spiel at the beginning and thinking to myself that I was doing okay with that part. The rest is a little foggy.

Jan asked the first questions, which were good, a little more challenging than I thought, but good. Then Jim asked some that I thought were really easy (thank you Jim!). Then Doc asked a doozy about how my work resembles the liberal arts tradition or a more vocational/corporate model of education. I mean, I knew the answer, but that was a hard one to actually put into words. Then at one point, the committee started talking amongst themselves which was rather nice because then the pressure was off me. Other than that, I can't remember much. It seemed like all of a sudden they were asking me to step out of the room so the committee could "discuss," and then 5 minutes later we were all back in the room and it was done!

We celebrated with dinner at the Olive Garden with the committee and friends. In all, a good time! Now....if only I could find a job!

Defense Day

Defense Day. What a terrible sounding name. It feels like I have to defend the last five years of my education today in one short period of time just so that I can graduate. I was getting pretty nervous last night, but woke up this morning feeling ok. My plan today is to read through the entire diss agin (Oy veh, I'm so sick of that thing) and review 1 more article that I want to have fresh in my mind. I'm not going into work at the CTLT today as I would normally do. I actually went in for a few extra hours on Friday, so I'm taking my time back today. I'll be sure to post something about the process and the results.

I did finally get my DC pictures off of my camera. And while I don't have a lot of time to spend playing with those and posting them on here, I thought I'd put up a few nices ones. The above picture is Ken and me along the tidal basin. As you can see, the cherry blossoms were once again blooming as nice as can be.

The picture on the right was taken using my camera's self timer while Mom, Ken and I were at the Jefferson Memorial. As you can see, the cherry blossoms and the Washington Monument are in the background. There's a tent and stage being set up for the cherry blossom festival music. Okay, I guess I should put off rereading my diss and actually get down to thinking about what's going to happen today. Remember...send me positive thoughts at 2:00 pm CST today!!!

Defense Countdown

I had to share this cute pic. Here is Jackson and me during Suzie and Rachel's visit a few weeks ago. Suz sent it to me, and I've been meaning to get it posted. I've got a freaky smile, but Jackson looks good, which is more important.

Here it is: 4 days until the dissertation defense. I haven't totally started freaking out about it yet, but I know come Saturday, and Sunday for sure, I'll feel it. I imagine it will feel something like comps, but I'm not sure. I think D, A, and I are going to get together for a bit on Sunday to do a practice session. We're all defending within the next week, so I thought it would be good practice to just sit and say our little spiel to each other and then let the other people try asking questions to which we have to try to respond. Though we won't know each other's topics, I think it will be good to actually try talking about diss-related matters. No one asks me about my diss anymore, so I don't talk about it anymore...other than to complain about it, of course. There seems to be a point at which people just stop asking you about the topic or what you think about it. Why is that? My guess is that they're sick of hearing you (me) whine about the process or the Director, which I will inevitably do if they ask me about it.

Work is slow today. I'm waiting for people to get materials back to me so I can finish this last major newsletter of my work career at ISU. It's kind of sad to think about, but this issue's been a pain in the wazoo, so I'm not thinking I'll miss it that much.

Ken's been sick in Iowa. He caught a cold right before DC which has turned into something nasty, at least a nasty cough. His co-workers even made him go home early on Tuesday because he was coughing so bad. He went to the urgent care center yesterday (at my mother's request). They gave him some meds, but where they called the RX in closed before he could get them. So he has to wait all day today to get them right after work. Poor guy. He's also supposed to be at Ft McCoy this weekend playing Army. I just hope he feels better. I can't do anything to help him from IL. I tried calling him to see how he was last night, but he seemed cranky, so my "try to be nice and do what I can from IL" call seemed wasted. I'm not one to talk. I've been so cranky lately about diss, job searching, and moving and he's had to put up with me. I suppose I can forgive him for being cranky when he's sick and has a good reason for being a grump.

Scary moment yesterday. My friend George at HCC lost everything on his thumbdrive when it decided to quit working on him. He lost all his students' grades from early February. I haven't backed mine up since early February myself, so when I got home yesterday, I made 2 extra copies of all that's on it. Imagine!!! Losing the diss (which I do have backed up elsewhere), all job letters, and more! Lesson learned early: never rely on technology to always "be there."

Will We Be Homeless?

I went to Iowa this weekend with the hope that Ken and I would get our housing situation settled. Unfortunately, that didn't happen. We looked at a few places and found one that we were pretty happy with, but after one co-owner had all but made Ken think it would be ready for us, the other co-owner told us that that wasn't totally the case. The current renters had not officially given notice and the owners didn't really want to force the issue since they have been good renters. Where does that leave us? Nowhere. But at least we're ok for a few more weeks. Bad news: Ken's sister has sold her house (where Ken's been staying and where our stuff has been stored since the move) and has a May 30 closing date. This means we have to have a new home before then so we can get out stuff out. Here's where the situation becomes tricky.

Option 1: Rent any place just to have a place. Sign a 12-month lease. Move our things out of the current house and into a new place all at once.

Problem 1: We haven't found a place that exactly meets our needs or that we're completely happy with.

Problem 2: I've been applying for jobs which are out of town and if (please God) I get one of them, we may want a place that's more in-between that place and Waterloo so as to cut the drive. Signing a 12-month lease now without any knowledge of jobs might be a bad idea.

Problem 3: Risk taking an apt that we aren't really sure we want just to have a place then then find one we like better but are stuck in a lease.

Problem 4: Sign a lease without me having a job and then Ken get's deployed (yes, it could happen). I'm left with a lease and no job. Definitely not appealing.


Option 2: Wait to sign a lease until we know more about jobs situation or find a home we like more.

Problem 1: If we wait to sign a lease for a month or so, we'll still have to move our stuff out of Kathy's house, store it, and then just have to move it again, resulting in much backbreaking labor and moving costs. Not appealing.

Problem 2: If we don't sign a lease, we have to live with more family. I hate to incovenience family. They've have been great and very supportive, but I would like to have my own space and my own things about me again.

Well, that's all I can think of right now. But what a mess and a pain. Why can't life be simple for once? I'm still waiting for all of the pieces to fall into place: graduation, job, home, engagement, etc. It's hard being patient when there are so many big (good???) things on the horizon. Just hurry up and happen already, I say!!!

The Date Has Been Set

Monday, April 21 at 2:00 p.m. That's my official defense date as agreed upon by the committee members. I can see now why the graduate secretary makes the grad student herself set the date with the committee. What a pain in the wazoo that was! Some can do this time; others can't. One wants 2 weeks to read the whole thing while the others are ok with one week. Then just when you think you're done and the date has been agreed upon, one can't do the same time that the others can. It's a real circus, I tell you. Alas, the one who wanted 2 weeks consented to reading it faster so that we could go to defense earlier as the others wanted to do since their schedules were filling up. (My personal opinion is that this person felt guilty about not registering for commencement and was trying to be more pleasing regarding this matter.)

I've been asking around for best ways to prepare for this event and have received some good feedback. Most people say to relax and trust myself that I know what I'm talking about -- that my committee wouldn't have let me get here without thinking I was ready to be done. That makes me feel better, but knowing myself, I know I have to do something to "prepare" in order to really feel ready. It sort of feels like comps again. What in the world will they ask me?? My plan so far is to go through some of the articles that I think are important to what I'm writing about (especially those I haven't read in a LONG time). I know I need to read through the entire diss again too to refresh, especially the Lit Review. I've been doing that this week as I proof it yet again for the committee. I'm sad to say that I'm bored with my own work. I don't know how many more times I can actually read that thing. Sometimes when I read it, I think "wow - that sounds pretty good." Other times I wonder whether a third grader wrote parts of it.

It's off to Iowa this weekend for me. Ken wants to look at some apartments/condos he's found through the Deere relocation people. Apparently, he's found a really good one for us to view. I plan to take diss reading with me to start reviewing it. I'm also starting to pack up some of the items from my room here to take back (books, etc.) as I'll really only be here for about 4 more weeks. That's scary/sad to think about. But I felt better when I got my graduation announcements in the mail yesterday. It was cool to see my name like that. I haven't had time to get them addressed or anything.

I continue applying for jobs. Sometimes I think I'm applying for one every day. No major leads yet though I did have a phone interview for a publishing job in Dubuque. I found another one in education in that area that I'm interested in as well. I found out last week that I didn't get the Grant Writer job in Waterloo. While initially sad, I realized it's for the best as I don't know if I'd be happy doing that anyway. I was just happy about the location and proximity to family, living, etc. I'm trying to be patient (not easy for me!) and realize that if it's not meant to be, it won't be. I'm still praying that the right job is out there waiting for me.

Perhaps this weekend I'll be able to get the DC pics loaded. Diss has to get done first!

Scheduling a Defense, etc.

The format check is complete and I am in the process of trying to schedule my dissertation defense. I just sent the email to the committee members asking them to give me their best dates/times. Hopefully, this will not be a terrible ordeal (as has been much of this process).

The DC trip was good. I'll write more about that later when I have pictures downloaded and ready to share.